Category: Pastor Blogs

There Are No Guarantees

The Supreme Court rulings today, striking down DOMA and allowing Judge Walker’s ruling against Proposition 8 to stand are welcome steps in the movement of our country to a more just and equal nation.

As a result of today’s rulings, same-gender couples in California and other states who are able to marry, will have their marriage receive the same Federal recognition as mine. This is a great step forward, but it is one of many still to come. And it is no guarantee.

Susan and I just celebrated 36 years of marriage. While it seems like a good run, we have friends who celebrated 64 years on the same day! I can tell you, that all those years ago, there was no guarantee that we would make it.

I don’t think our parents expected it. I know some of our friends did not expect it. To be honest, I was not sure we would make it. It has not been particularly hard, but it was not easy either. There was no guarantee.

Well, there was one guarantee. We were guaranteed a chance to try.

As a priest, I have helped a number of couples prepare for marriage. If Susan and I (37 year ago versions) were to come before me, as their pastor, I am not sure that I would think they were ready. But we were guaranteed the chance.We grew up with the possibility of marriage, and making the most of it – or not.

At St. Paul’s we have Gay and Lesbian couples who have been together as long or longer than Susan and me. When they made the decision to give themselves to each other, they didn’t even have our single guarantee.

Today that changes.

Today, in a world that offers few guarantees, Lesbian and Gay Californians have one. They are guaranteed the chance to try and make a marriage work.

Our work as the community of faith is to support them, as we have tried to support opposite-gender couples. I hope this is good news for those who only recently have been permitted to marry. If it is, it will be because we have become a community of blessing. We have become a community that listens to Jesus and practices welcome and compassion. We have become a community that walks with one another. Our work as a community of blessing has just begun, again.

And there are no guarantees.

Fr. Andrew

One of the things that I hear about church is that “they are always asking for money.” I don’t think that is technically true, but I understand the feeling.

I pay to go to the gym. In the contract, after the fee for joining, there is an additional “maintenance fee” to be paid every 6 months. In addition to upset, it piqued my sense of irony. What is my membership fee paying for if not the maintenance of the equipment?

The leadership of St. Paul’s needs and asks for the support of every member; to sustain and expand the ministry done by all our members; and to maintain the facilities where we worship, offer some of our ministries, and administer the whole enterprise. Our Abundant Living Action Team is tireless in building the context of this giving. Money is AN area touched by Stewardship.

The needs of the world around us are great and as a community of people who care, we are asked to help. We try to filter the requests so that they are not constant and so that they have a connection with our mission as a Parish. Everyone is asked to help, none must, some will. There is no judgement made about givers or non-givers.

For 3 years, Susan and I did not earn any income. During that time we gave nothing to the church or to any charities. As our situation has changed, our giving has changed. It seems like that is the way things should work.

This Fall and Winter St. Paul’s will be asked to support these outside needs:

Desert AIDS Walk: For 24 years our membership has supported this effort by the Desert AIDS Project. Our members include staff, volunteers and clients of the DAP. Our parish was an early place of comfort for those infected with HIV/AIDS. We hope to have a large team walking and many people supporting.

The Desert Blind and Handicapped Association: This group offers rides to the disabled who need assistance. As I am writing this message, lunch is being prepared for the clients of the association in Hogarth Hall and I will give God thanks for them and for the food in just a few minutes.

The United Thank Offering: On November 11th we will receive the Fall Offering for the work of the UTO. This is the oldest offering in the Episcopal Church and possibly the widest. The Episcopal Church Women use this offering to make a difference in our Diocese, in the Episcopal Church, and around the World.

Re-Build Our Church in Haiti: The Diocese of Haiti is the largest and the poorest diocese in the Episcopal Church. In the aftermath of last year’s devastating earthquake, the people of that Diocese asked for help rebuilding their Cathedral Center. This is not like building a cathedral in the United States or in Europe. This is a center for education, healthcare, nutrition, as well as a place to worship God.

In the reading from Acts 10 we read this weekend, the apostle Peter and his friends experience and we readers witness a new way of being Christian. People who had no business being included are embraced. They are embraced, not by the Christians initially, but by God’s Spirit. Peter catches on and becomes an advocate for this new way.

This weekend we are hosting a small event with Robert V. Taylor. He will be reading from his new book: A New Way To Be Human. Robert will read from and sign copies of his book at 9:15 in the library.

In my reading of Roberts book, I have already discovered some similarities between it and Peter’s new way of being Christian. Both emphasize a gentle engagement with hospitality, both are about building community, and both a Spirit driven. If you are in the neighborhood tomorrow, join us.

After our small event, Robert heads to Los Angeles for another event to engage in creative spiritual growth. On Wednesday evening he will have a conversation with the Rt. Rev. Desmond Tutu in the Bing Auditorium at LACMA. The 7:30 event was sold out within minutes of being announced online.

The reading from Acts, Robert’s new book, and the up-coming conversation with Bp. Tutu are all part of building our spiritual community here at St. Paul’s.

Personal Update

Ordinarily I comment on one of the Scriptures for the following weekend, but I have been asked to comment on a more personal issue. So I hope you will indulge me in this Abundant Lite. Next week will be back to the Scripture.

I thought of making the header to say “Where’s Susan?” The answer requires me to give an update on Susan’s and my health.

First Susan. In late October, Susan was hit with a severe ear/sinus infection. This had an impact on vision, balance, and several aspects of her hearing. In addition, it required lot’s of time with several doctors and Urgent Care visits. Loud noise had become very painful to Susan.

Since October, Susan has missed lots of work time and has shifted her worship time to Saturday at 4 or Sunday at 8. She has not been able to sing with the choir. Despite all the medical expertise, the first prognosis from the EENT specialist seems to have been most accurate. It will get better, but it will take time. Susan is getting better and I don’t believe has missed but one weekend of worship. The 4 & 8 worshipers are getting to know her. She hopes to be back in choir when she is able. She needs to target her energy on her classroom and her students.

My situation is simpler. Since being diagnosed with MS in August, I have been doing lots of work with several doctors to make sure that I understand the disease and manage my care. The diagnosis came from an MRI of my spine when investigating a pinched nerve. I was, and remain largely without symptoms. It turns out that the problems I thought were related, were actually the result of a pinched nerve.

Evidently, despite my best efforts, I am aging and getting the aches and pains most people are familiar with. I now see a Neurologist occasionally and take medication once a week.

Susan and I are well cared for medically. We are blessed by God’s love, with our own faith and the support and prayers of family and parish.

Neither of us is going anywhere. Although we have been here 23 years, we are not very close to retirement. Both Susan and I are delighted in our Vocations and we regularly seek to develop and grow. I am looking forward to the next stage of my ministry with St. Paul in the Desert. To that end, I anticipate beginning my second Sabbatical in the next 18 months.

Join Susan and me in worship this weekend as we practice God’s abundant love together and live it out the rest of the week.

Fr. Andrew

St. Paul in the Desert, Palm Springs, CA
Vestry Nominees 2012-2015

One of the main events of the Annual Parish Meeting on January 29th at 9:15 am (between the
services) is the election of our 4 Vestry Members to serve until January 2015. A nominating
committee made up of the outgoing Vestry members has put prayer, thought and discussion
into the slate of Nominees below.
 

Thomas L. Baxley
I have been active in Episcopal Churches since 1967 and a member
of St. Paul in the Desert since 2007. I serve as an Acolyte, Chalice
Bearer, and Worship Coordinator at the 8 am service. I am also a
member of the Altar Guild.

Jerome F. Di Noto (Jerry)
I grew in learning about St. Paul’s through the Dignity group, which
holds its weekly liturgy in the church. I became an active member
in 2010 and was formally received last year. Currently, I chair the
Adult Faith Formation Team which is responsible for sponsoring
regularly scheduled classes on various theological and spirituality
based topics. I worship at the 8 am service.
 
 

Sharon Strong
I came to St. Paul’s two years ago to worship and serve in a
community that was welcome to all because it is deeply committed
to and active life in Christ. My background includes teaching
career, a commission sales business, and raising two children. I am
a member of the Choir.

Ryan Uhlenkott
I have been a parishioner at St. Paul’s for 10 years. I have served as
a lector, an acolyte, a chalice bearer, and a member of the church
choir for two years. In my professional life, I have been a Social
Worker for 15 years. I worship at the 8 am service.

The service of Baptism with Confirmation (inc. all the sub-categories) is a great time to see the congregation anew. The Rt. Rev. Chilton Knudsen was the presider and preacher. She was also a partner with our Catechist, Br. Michael-Gregory in the 6 weeks of preparation. A goodly number have taken her up on her offer of a personal conversation regarding this new turn in their spiritual journey. The congregation was born again, born from above.

In fairness to the current Diocesan Bishop, the Rt. Rev. James Mathes, we have always been blessed by excellent interactions with our Bishop. In fact, I believe that all of our diocesan bishops have done a good job with their visitations; taking time with a whole rage of people. The gift of a bishop in residence, pastoring, teaching, coaching and laughing for 42 days, however, is rare. The gift of a diocesan bishop welcoming a sister bishop to engage so deeply in the life of a congregation is even more rare. The congregation was born again, born from above.

The experience that we have had was summarized in a line from today’s gospel, John 3:16. “For God so loved…”  We have been loved by people who track their loving from God. We have lived what it is like to have a Godly lover loose in our midst. The day was filled with intimate words for people who have made spiritual decisions, public affirmations of congregational ownership, and the catholic symbols of our connection to Christ – water, oil, bread and wine. The congregation was born again, born from above.

One of the most amazing gifts of our bishop in residence is to come from the outside, become a companion with the parish, and remind us of all the ways that God continues to love us. The new birth, the birth from above is all about this.

This is not so new. This is happening all the time. Today, my eyes were born from above and I could see in a new way all of the love that is the life of St. Paul’s. This is something that happens when we are open to the new people who are being baptized or confirmed. It is something that happens when we are open to new worshipers. It is something that happens when we are open to our Friday lunch guests. We will be born again, from above.

Maybe this IS all we need: “For God so loved…”

Matthew Stewart died last night.

Matthew was 24 and he died after a long fight with Batten Disease.

Today I learned that Matthew was amazingly connected with God, and always had been.

Matthew brought his parents to church. It was not one of those pressures of parenthood where mom and dad feel compelled to get to church in order to have a child baptized. In pre-school he asked his mom if she would take him to church. Diane had been raised in the Episcopal Church back east and sought one in Palm Springs. They found St. Paul’s and about 3 years later he was baptized.

Matthew loved being in the church and with church friends and always exuded gratitude, joy and peace.

The presence of God he experienced was not just in church, but throughout his life. As he grew, the disease took it’s toll on him and he gradually went blind. When someone asked him about being blind he responded that “Jesus is my eyes.”

Over the years, his spiritual connection grew. When the children from Sunday School entered church for Prayers and Communion with their families, Matthew would say the words from memory. He did not say the words his family was saying, but the words the priest was saying – right along with the priest. He had no question that they were his as well.

He lived in a place where angels were his companions. Some of them were the angels his mother could see and some were known only to him. One of the angels was a care giver who was with Matthew for many years. She began transcribing his thoughts and poems and essays.

Sparky

Sparky liked to eat bread,

dog food, and cat poo, too!

He died and went to heaven

where he will have a good time

chasing skunks and jack rabbits.

Now he can have his whole life

up in heaven, always happy.

Grampa and Bryce loved Sparky,

too. But they know it is OK that he

died because he was really sick and

now he is in heaven.

Heaven is a good place for dogs.

Matthew Stewart (approximately age 13).

I found this poem in a book on my desk before I went to visit Kevin and Diane this afternoon. Reading it with them helped tie my thoughts and my feelings about Matthew’s death together.

The loss of Matthew from the fabric of our parish family opens a wound. Reading Matthew’s own and oft repeated reflections on the world in which he lived and the God and people he loved, starts the healing. It allows me to rinse the wound with tears of joy.

In the Gospel for this week (Matthew 5:38-48) Jesus refers to turning the other cheek, and other responses to personal attacks. It seems that the context is the particular honor/shame culture of the time. Emerson Powery sees this as referring to fair justice and non-violent resistance.

Susan was at a lab for blood work yesterday. She entered when the lab opened and began to be processed. Another woman entered within a minute and began complaining immediately. Susan thought the work was done well and timely, the other woman was pleased with nothing.

Jesus words were about responding to acts that were unjust. The experience of the complaining lab patron reminds me of a very common background noise today – almost anything that does not happen as one would like might be labeled an injustice to be righted.

I can even identify it in my own behavior. A mistake at a restaurant or someone who blocks me by driving too slow. When I reflect it is clear that mine are trivial.

In fact, I am a person of privilege. The things that sometimes bother me are not violations of my rights or dignity, but impositions on my closeted sense of privilege. (I can’t admit it, but I feel it intensely when thwarted.)

Perhaps instead of turning the other cheek for my bruised privilege, I could turn towards the other’s cheek. Maybe I could hear Jesus words as an invitation to attend to those who are really being attacked and lack standing in the community to find justice. Perhaps I could use my standing to help them seek resolution.